Monday, February 29, 2016

KNOW THE TWO RULES

     There are two good rules for making funeral arrangements.
     Rule One:   Know what you are getting.  There are so many details involved in a funeral that you may be unclear about everything you have discussed with the funeral director.  An itemized list should  be provided of everything included in the funeral - along with prices.  That way you can be sure of what you will be getting, make changes if necessary, and know how much it will all cost.
     Rule Two:  Get what you want.  You probably have a good idea of what kind of funeral or memorial you want before you even discuss these matters with a funeral director.  He or she may have some valuable and practical suggestions and you should certainly be open to these  However, you do not want to be influenced into making decisions you will regret later.  If you want a simple, but elegant funeral or if cost is a consideration, do not contract for a funeral which is elaborate and expensive.  Your funeral director will discuss all the options available to you.

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

FINDING THE RIGHT FUNERAL HOME



     Assuming that arrangements have NOT been made beforehand, the first task facing survivors is finding survivors is finding a good funeral home.  Often feeling rushed and bewildered, inadequate and bereft, relatives of the deceased may take the path of least resistance and choose the services of a funeral director at random, picking out a firm with the largest ad or hiring a firm which is in closest proximity.
     More care of choice should be taken, even if the bereaved is in no mood for dealing with such difficult details.  A choice made in haste may well be regretted at leisure.
     The best of all methods for choosing a funeral director is work-of-mouth recommendation from those whose advice you trust.  Talk to people who have recently had a death in the family.  Were they satisfied with the service they received from the funeral home?  Whom do they recommend?  A funeral director can be a genuine help in time of crisis.  It is worth spending the effort to do a little research.

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

DEALING WITH BURNOUT

     Sometimes when family members take care of a dying person day in and day out, they experience a kind of burnout.  This is something that the dying person's family must watch for carefully.  Relatives and friends can work with a dying person for only so long before reaching the limits of their endurance.  Just as the body becomes fatiqued, so the spirit can be overexposed to the strain, worry, and anguish that nursing care demands.
     In order to minimize the chances of this happening, people doing the care giving must learn to pace themselves and to gauge their limits.  If, after long periods of taking care of a sick person, they observe a tendency toward increasing irritation, or chronic fatigue, or depression, it means that a pause is in order - a day off, a quick vacation to clear the head, a change of scenery.  It doesn't mean you care less, only that you want to care for the person in the best way possible.